Journalling in 2025 | ONE

1st. What are your goals for the year 

I say this every January but I would love to lose weight and get healthy and also I would love to save some money and get myself some dental implants as this gap in my tooth is starting to really effect me. But more importantly enjoy the year, be happy and stay healthy.

2nd. What Scares You

Not being there for my children as they get older. Since becoming a mum health anxiety is something I suffer from and I worry that something is going to happen to me and I will not be around to be there for my girls and watch my them grow up. 

3rd. What three things from Christmas do you wish to remember 

Lilly and Millie watching the Santa tracker on Christmas Eve, Lilly especially was getting ever so excited when you could see Santa and the Elves getting ready for Christmas. Lilly and Millie watching Home Alone with Richard, they absolutely loved the pranks. Lastly just seeing their faces as they open their presents and just spending the time together, which was out last Christmas as a family of four.

4th. Do you believe in soulmates

I have been with Richard for 18 years and I could not imagine being with anyone else, I think he is perfect for me, he knows me so well and I believe I know him inside and out. So I would have said that he is my soulmate.

5th. One word for the year and why

Happiness, I believe as long as you are happy then not much else can go wrong! I want to make lots of happy memories with my family, ones I can keep and cherish forever.

6th. Three things you can't live without 

Richard, My Children, My Parents! Im not to sure how I can elaborate on this one. Richard is the love of my life and he does so much for me and the girls, he always puts his family first and is one of the most selfless, kind and generous people I know. Lilly, Mille and now Maisie have completed my life, and as soon as they were born I knew I could not be without them. My Mum and Dad do absolutely everything for me. Whenever I need anything they are always there for me.

7th. Something you feeling guilty about

Being a mum and feeing guilty just go hand in hand! Now with a newborn baby, I feel so guilty that I am not paying enough attention to Lilly and Millie! I feel bad when the house is a mess, but then I feel bad when I clean it instead of spending time with them! I hate when I raise my voice to them! I constantly feel like I should be doing more! I feel bad when I give them fish fingers and waffles for the 3rd time that week! The worst is when I want to get something done so I give them their iPads and then they say they don't want it, oh boy does that make me feel bad! 

8th. What was your favourite toy as a child

Sega Master System, Sonic the hedgehog, Alex the Kid, Gain Ground, Street Fighter! I loved my Barbies and I loved Whack-Attack but me and my brother would spend hours on the Sega so that must have been the best toy ever!

9th. What would you do if you knew you could not fail

I would properly have to say play the Lottery! I know that is a naughty answer but a big or small win would help out loads. I do play the lottery every once in a while and every time I do I imagine in my head winning and what I would do. Im not greedy, a smallish win would help, £500K would be nice but then I  would not say no to £127M.

10th. Your Favourite Flower

Daffodils, I think they just brighten up the place and I also love them because they are cheap, so I don't mind buying them, because lets be honest why would you spend a small fortune on something that is going to die at some point and end up in the bin.

11th. Three favourite TV Shows

Friends, even though I have not watched it since Matthew Perry died, I just can't bring myself to do it. I have been a fan of the show since I can remember, showing my age but I had all 10 series on VHS and then the black DVD box and then the extended version boxset. Gavin and Stacy, I can watch this over and over again on repeat and still find it funny. Only Fools and Horses, just a classic and can't beat it.

12th. What is your favourite memory

Most of my memories are sparked by photos! But I do have one memory that is actually a memory and it is with my Nanny, I went to school in Castle Acre where she lived with my grandad and sometimes she would pick me up and walk me back to their house and more often than not she would take us to the village shop and this time in particular she bought me some mini marshmallows and I remember her trying one and saying that it tasted like chalk.

13th. Places you enjoy visiting 

Weymouth is a firm favourite of mine, however I do feel that I need to give that a year or so break as the last few times have not felt the same. It was mine and Richards first holiday together, his Grandma used to live there and we would go and stay with her. I do love it and Richard always suggests going there even if it is just for a couple of nights. 

14th. How do you cope with Worry

I don't, I do worry about a lot of things, I let things play on my mind and some the things I worry about hold me back so much, but I still can't help but worry about them. I think I need to start telling myself if i can't change it then don't worry about it. 

15th. What do you envy

Confident people. I would do anything to feel comfortable in my own skin. I was confident when I was younger, middle school I was fine and happy, when I got to highs school I kind of lost it a little but I gained so much confidence when I went to college and beyond! However then I got ill with P.O.T.S when I was 21 and was bed ridden for about 5 years, in that time I totally lost all my confidence, I did not go out and when I did I would end up being ill for a week afterwards. I got a little bit of confidence back after having Lilly but after Millie I lost it and now after Maisie.. Gone!! 

16th. What is your favourite time of day

Bedtime! I love my bed and I think I always have. My mum said that I used to be in bed by 6.30 when I was younger. Given the chance I would now too.

17th. Things you always do with your dad when you were little

I was a proper daddy's girl and I loved being with him. My dad was a mechanic and I would often go up to his garage at the top of the garden and help him, wether he thought I was helping was another story.

18th. What would you do if you were a Teacher

Well what is the easiest subject to teach, it would be that one.

19th. Your saddest memory

When I found out that my Nan had died. I remember just crying in the corner, she was the first person I ever lost and to be someone close made it even worse.

20th. What is something you love about yourself.

Im not sure wether this is a good thing, but I love that I can have a smile on my face all the time, no matter how Im feeling inside. I think this is because I don't want to make people feel uncomfortable. So if Im feeling low or angry and I see some one I don't want to put that on them or make it awkward.

21st. When you were a child, how did you imagine your adult self.

I didn't! I never thought about growing up and I think my child hood benefited from this! Lilly said to me the other day how she could not wait to be a grown up and I said to her, time goes by so quick and before you know it you will be an adult, so just enjoy being a kid. I can not remember ever feeling like that.

22nd. Describe a good neighbour

Someone who keep them self to them self, but there if you need them and keeps there garden and house looking nice so you have a nice view out of your window. not noisy and respectable. I am lucky that i am surrounded by lovely neighbours but they are of an older generation, so they fit my criteria well, i only have one neighbour who could keep their garden a bit nicer.

23rd. Who is someone you miss. 

I have lost many people in my life, but the person I miss the most is defiantly my Nanny. She died when I was 7 and she was the first close person in my life that I lost and I think so much about how great it would be to have her in my life still, for her to have met Richard and maybe lived long enough to have met Lilly.

24th. What childhood memories do you associate with winter 

Laying infant of the wood burner and looking out the french doors at the cold frosty garden.

25th. Are you a morning or night person.

Morning! I can't wait to get in to bed at night and get to sleep, the earlier the better and I like to wake up and get ready for the day.

26th. If you could have dinner with anyone currently alive, who

Properly just Richard, as it would just be me and him and we could have a nice meal without the girls, as much as I love them, they are the most fussy eaters ever and meal times are properly my least favourite part of the day! So a meal with just Me and Richard would be lovely.

27th. What is your current go to outfit

Leggings and a top with a shirt. Nothing else fits me and the top and shirt is ideal for breast feeding. 

28th. What is your favourite meal to cook and why

A pasta bake, and for the pure reason that everyone will eat it! I like it, Richard likes it and most importantly so does Lilly and Millie.

29th. How do you feel about the dark

I used to hate it, but it surprising how used to the dark you get when you pay for your own electricity. Growing up my mum regardless used to leave the landing light on, so when I moved out I automatically left a light on, but I can go to sleep in the pitch black and with a little light on. 

30th. Where were you born and have you been back there since 

I was born in Kings lynn Queen Elizabeth Hospital and I was recently there having my third baby, all my girls were born in the same hospital that I was born in, which I think is quite nice actually. 

31st. What does January mean to you

Defiantly new beginnings and chance to start over.